Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Do Zebras like snow? By Mr Zebra

Last weekend I was out and about in Nottingham distributing flyers and button badges (promoting the Half Term Holiday Happenings). There were few takers that morning...those amongst you who had ventured out were focused upon remaining on two legs...treacherous conditions underfoot. It was remarkable that several people who passed before me were ill prepared for this current spell of mushy whether...no coat, their arms tightly wrapped around their own bodies...shivering and struggling to remain balanced...and likewise Mr. Zebra; shivering... at a standstill...by a lion. I am certainly not primed for this weather. I remind myself that this is only my third winter here in the UK and I rarely ventured out during the previous two winters...I do not particularly like the damp and the snow here in the UK seems to be shoddy stuff...it is good for about an hour then its rubbish.

I started to worry about Trench Foot.

Trench foot is a medical condition caused by prolonged exposure of the feet to damp, unsanitary, and cold conditions...trench foot does not require freezing temperatures.

...and my four appendages were most certainly damp! We Zebras are used to warmer climates and without doubt we can shiver in very cold weather just like humans...I observed this the preceding Sunday; I stood by the right Lion in the Old Market Square, my mitts sodden and icy after walking through the remnants of some fetid mushy snow. I remember grandma Lucy used to tell me a story; she said that we zebras were all white at one time. One day Zebra (For Zebra existed as our primary character) was hiding from Lion by standing in the tall grass. He stood there for so long and held very still the whole time so that Lion would not see him. The hot sun cast the shadows of the blades of grass across the white of Zebra's body. He stood there so long that the shadows became permanent and that is why we Zebra are striped to this day. Back to the Market Square. 




After about an hour I somewhat wretchedly capitulated and did the commonsensical thing and called it a day...if the Local Derby; Derby and Forest could be called off, then I also could concede defeat. I returned home...put my four feet up on the sofa and settled down to watch an Audrey Hepburn film on DVD (Sabrina). As a rule I will not place my muddy hooves on the sofa...on this occasion I decided I deserved it.


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